Last year I was living the dream with a great paying job, going on my first vacation, bought a new home and learning to live on my own after 33 years of marriage.
All the sudden when I got back from vacation everything changed. My position was dissolved; I didn’t have a job, no income, OMG I was terrified. I started pounding the internet and applying everywhere I could. It took me four very long months just to find a job. This job only pays half of what my previous job paid but it was $300 more than unemployment and included benefits.
I want my life back! I want to get a paycheck and know I have a few extra bucks to buy a new dress or pair of pants if I want. Not with this job! I worry about making the mortgage and eating.
Then I read in one of my books that we are the creator of our own experiences caused by the way we view life and project our thoughts. W-T-H, where did I go wrong. Somewhere out there are my thoughts of wanting to experience a struggling life full of stress and worry about how to survive.
I have not lost hope because my thoughts will circle around hopefully and all the happiness that I was experiencing has to come back to me. When we have positive views and outputs about our life and world around us, it attracts more of the same. What I did not know is that our desires come to us a lot slower than we would like and we must be careful not to lose faith and start thinking negative or that is what we will get back.
I feel into a slump of wondering what I did wrong, what was I needing to experience to make this happen to me, but actually it is not happening to me it is happening for me. Our souls are the leaders of our journeys if we truly listen we will know where it wants to take us and we can enjoy the ride and put fear and stress out of the experience.
We are always given everything we need to make it in this world believe it or not. I am surviving on half of my previous pay and learning to accept this journey and look around more often to see everyone around me. This is very new to me but guess what? I am on the ride of my life and I give full control to God. We are the creators because we choose which way our life will go with each opportunity that is put in our path. We are the ones with the free choice and ability to decide what, when, where and how we want to move through life. I had the choice to stay on unemployment or take a job that is half what my old job paid me. I chose to take the one that was in front of me. Where will this path lead me? I have no idea but I am learning with every step and I will meditate daily to try and tune into my souls teaching and possibly I will learn what I need to know and can move on. Until then I will be happy that I am alive and have wonderful friends and family to love.
Don’t stress or worry about life, sit back and know that planning, controlling and manipulating the situation will only delay the journey. Just enjoy!